PREGNANT Louisa Lytton told her fiancé she hates her body in an emotional Instagram post.
The actress – who plays Ruby Allen in the BBC One soap – is expecting her first baby with fiance Ben Bhanvra.
Speaking on Instagram, the 32-year-old star shared: “I hate my body and I don’t like what is going on!”
She opened up further on the Made By Mammas podcast and explained: “You are pregnant so everyone around you feels like this is the best news possible.
“This is what you wanted so you should feel happy every day and not have any negative thoughts. And in my head I thought this doesn’t sit right.
“I am so happy that I am pregnant but I am so unhappy in many other ways. At first I had sickness but my body was changing and I wasn’t in control of the fact that I had no energy. Normally I am a really energetic person.”
To add to her stress Louisa said she has been fighting cravings, saying she wants the bad foods she wouldn’t normally eat.
“I was craving really terrible foods and I don’t really eat like that. You are almost afraid to speak to anyone around it,” Louisa added.
The mum-to-be also admitted she felt “terrible” talking to pals about the “negatives” of pregnancy.
She added: “My mum was like, ‘You are pregnant of course you are going to put on weight’.
“And to my friends who hadn’t been through it, I felt terrible to be negative around the fact that I was pregnant when some people are trying.”
The soap star has just finished work and doesn’t know if she’ll return to EastEnders immediately.
She shared: “I’m at home being a mum.
“I’m doing the thing I’ve wanted the most in life, so I don’t think I’ll be in a rush to go back to work.
“But then, at the same time, I don’t know because that is who I am,” she continued. “So will I have that moment of, ‘I need a bit more of myself back again?’
“I’m gonna stay home, give it a year, I think, of me not working. But if I decide to go back before or after, we’ll work it out from there.”
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